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A poll about being young.
   
~pw~
4/29/2004     
Member Alio has been posting about being a mature 15 year old.

I have been thinking about this. I told her what she is feeling is recycled. Old to alot of us, been there, done that and new to her and every teen out there.

So i thought I would sask

How many felt at 14, 15, 16 they were mature to make choices their parents did not want them to make?

How many felt the first love was the one that would last forever?

How many felt parents did not understand what it was like to be a teen/young?

How many felt at 14, 15,16 you could make choices that would be life altering and they would be the right one always?

How many (say over 21) still feel they were more mature then anyone else when they were 15?

How many wish they had waiting to have that first sexual encounter?

How many are with their first true love?


==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #4112 Back to top ▲
4/29/2004
  
~pw~
Member
Alio has been posting about being a mature 15 year old.

I have been thinking about this. I told her what she is feeling is recycled. Old to alot of us, been there, done that and new to her and every teen out there.

So i thought I would sask

How many felt at 14, 15, 16 they were mature to make choices their parents did not want them to make?

How many felt the first love was the one that would last forever?

How many felt parents did not understand what it was like to be a teen/young?

How many felt at 14, 15,16 you could make choices that would be life altering and they would be the right one always?

How many (say over 21) still feel they were more mature then anyone else when they were 15?

How many wish they had waiting to have that first sexual encounter?

How many are with their first true love?


==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #4112
~pw~
4/29/2004     
Member This was not behind your back Alio, it is right out in the open.

What made me think of this, simply because I know I am not always right. The knowledge of not always being right, not having all the answers and not thinking no one understands me or what I went/go threw all come with age and maturity.

The reason for this poll was to see if I was way off base. Now I was [pretty sure I was not to far from the base, but still maybe I need some thought altering input.

Instead of justifying yourself, just listen with an open mind to what folks say.

As for being together in 2 years or forever, well it could happen for you and your boyfriend. Itsome times does. people meet get married in two weeks and live forever loving each other. It has been know to happen for the young as well. Lorretta Lynn was 14 when she married her husband. it was rough but they made it together into their old age. My great grandparents were the same.

Jusr read with an open mind and learn from what is said instead of fighting it. No one has said you are immature. no one said leave your boyfriend.





==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #678291 Back to top ▲
4/29/2004
  
~pw~
Member
This was not behind your back Alio, it is right out in the open.

What made me think of this, simply because I know I am not always right. The knowledge of not always being right, not having all the answers and not thinking no one understands me or what I went/go threw all come with age and maturity.

The reason for this poll was to see if I was way off base. Now I was [pretty sure I was not to far from the base, but still maybe I need some thought altering input.

Instead of justifying yourself, just listen with an open mind to what folks say.

As for being together in 2 years or forever, well it could happen for you and your boyfriend. Itsome times does. people meet get married in two weeks and live forever loving each other. It has been know to happen for the young as well. Lorretta Lynn was 14 when she married her husband. it was rough but they made it together into their old age. My great grandparents were the same.

Jusr read with an open mind and learn from what is said instead of fighting it. No one has said you are immature. no one said leave your boyfriend.





==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #678291
Christopher
4/29/2004     
Member I'll try to take these sequentially:

How many felt at 14, 15, 16 they were mature to make choices their
parents did not want them to make?

At the time, I felt that I did have the maturity and wisdom to make
choices for my health and well being. Looking back on that time frame
now, I am very certain that I was in no way equipped to make decisions
that were best for not only my short term but long term health and well
being.


How many felt the first love was the one that would last forever?

Love as I know it now will. Adoration and affection as I perceived love
to be then would not have.


How many felt parents did not understand what it was like to be a
teen/young?

I've always had a close relationship with my father in particular and I
never had the feeling that he did not understand what it was like to be
that age. If anything, I understood that the decisions he made for me
and regarding me were ultimately for my own betterment and well
being. My father was also of the apparently rare type who could explain
his decision logically and clearly in a way that I understood them
without resorting to dictatorial high handedness.


How many felt at 14, 15,16 you could make choices that would be life
altering and they would be the right one always?

I believe we all feel that way given that at that age, we have a
microcosmic view of the world. However, both time and experience
teach that you have to take a macrocosmic view to understand that
change is constant and no choice ever remains inviolate.


How many (say over 21) still feel they were more mature then anyone
else when they were 15?

I would definitely say I was but then again that was also a product of
my upbringing as my parents did not believe in shielding their children
unnecessarily and taught to our respective maturity and intelligence
levels.


How many wish they had waiting to have that first sexual encounter?

I do not.

How many are with their first true love?

What defines "true"? If that means to completely engage with another
person in a relationship in which you are fully open, as a person and a
as an intellect, then I would state I am with my first true love.


This message was edited by Christopher on 4-29-04 @ 2:37 PM


.
Post #678293 Back to top ▲
4/29/2004
  
Christopher
Member
I'll try to take these sequentially:

How many felt at 14, 15, 16 they were mature to make choices their
parents did not want them to make?

At the time, I felt that I did have the maturity and wisdom to make
choices for my health and well being. Looking back on that time frame
now, I am very certain that I was in no way equipped to make decisions
that were best for not only my short term but long term health and well
being.


How many felt the first love was the one that would last forever?

Love as I know it now will. Adoration and affection as I perceived love
to be then would not have.


How many felt parents did not understand what it was like to be a
teen/young?

I've always had a close relationship with my father in particular and I
never had the feeling that he did not understand what it was like to be
that age. If anything, I understood that the decisions he made for me
and regarding me were ultimately for my own betterment and well
being. My father was also of the apparently rare type who could explain
his decision logically and clearly in a way that I understood them
without resorting to dictatorial high handedness.


How many felt at 14, 15,16 you could make choices that would be life
altering and they would be the right one always?

I believe we all feel that way given that at that age, we have a
microcosmic view of the world. However, both time and experience
teach that you have to take a macrocosmic view to understand that
change is constant and no choice ever remains inviolate.


How many (say over 21) still feel they were more mature then anyone
else when they were 15?

I would definitely say I was but then again that was also a product of
my upbringing as my parents did not believe in shielding their children
unnecessarily and taught to our respective maturity and intelligence
levels.


How many wish they had waiting to have that first sexual encounter?

I do not.

How many are with their first true love?

What defines "true"? If that means to completely engage with another
person in a relationship in which you are fully open, as a person and a
as an intellect, then I would state I am with my first true love.


This message was edited by Christopher on 4-29-04 @ 2:37 PM


.
Post #678293
~pw~
4/29/2004     
Member Define true eh?

smiles* I call that first love in our lifes, that first pounding of our hearts that send our juices flowing in our teen years, true love.

Why? Because we do not care so much about job, money, schooling, manners, smarts, family background, where they live, what their family is like or a bunch of other stuff that seems to become more important with age.

I have no idea why at 14 I felt so deeply in love with John. There was no rythm or reason for it. There was litle in common and yet I was so sure we would be together untill were died at a ripe old age. There was nothing anyone could say to change my mind.

There was no sex. I was the school virgin. Oh I used sex of course. I was the "game". I overheard some boys betting who would fuck me first and I won the bet *laughing* When I was with John I had the rep of being the biggest whore in school, simply cause he was the biggest stud and no girl could ever say no to him. I did and He did not push the issue. My viriginity is what made me different from the rest. Different was more important then sex at that point in my life. So now when i remark about a sluty virgin that always comes to mind (l).

He would write me 5 page love letters and slip them into my back pack. He was the most awesome "man" ever and no one could understand he was not really the bad boy they thought he ways. All the busts were just silly mistakes.

I knew I would love Him and be his forever no matter what. Then at 15 I was explaining bruises and black eyes. Of course he was still perfect, wonderful and the love of my life.

The only thing that mattered was being with him, not if he could provide or even be a good person. I think when we are in our teens are love is the purest it will ever be. That first heartache can affect forever and how/who we love again.

It is a love that comes, hopefully, before life's lessons take it's toll.


==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #678294 Back to top ▲
4/29/2004
  
~pw~
Member
Define true eh?

smiles* I call that first love in our lifes, that first pounding of our hearts that send our juices flowing in our teen years, true love.

Why? Because we do not care so much about job, money, schooling, manners, smarts, family background, where they live, what their family is like or a bunch of other stuff that seems to become more important with age.

I have no idea why at 14 I felt so deeply in love with John. There was no rythm or reason for it. There was litle in common and yet I was so sure we would be together untill were died at a ripe old age. There was nothing anyone could say to change my mind.

There was no sex. I was the school virgin. Oh I used sex of course. I was the "game". I overheard some boys betting who would fuck me first and I won the bet *laughing* When I was with John I had the rep of being the biggest whore in school, simply cause he was the biggest stud and no girl could ever say no to him. I did and He did not push the issue. My viriginity is what made me different from the rest. Different was more important then sex at that point in my life. So now when i remark about a sluty virgin that always comes to mind (l).

He would write me 5 page love letters and slip them into my back pack. He was the most awesome "man" ever and no one could understand he was not really the bad boy they thought he ways. All the busts were just silly mistakes.

I knew I would love Him and be his forever no matter what. Then at 15 I was explaining bruises and black eyes. Of course he was still perfect, wonderful and the love of my life.

The only thing that mattered was being with him, not if he could provide or even be a good person. I think when we are in our teens are love is the purest it will ever be. That first heartache can affect forever and how/who we love again.

It is a love that comes, hopefully, before life's lessons take it's toll.


==============================
When the end comes, will any one remember the sound of my voice, the touch of my heart or just the feel of something less important?
Post #678294
krissy
5/6/2004     
Member
I really shouldn't be replying to this, as my international economics paper is rotting in my bag, but... *g*

alio, I was 15 less than a decade ago (yes, I'm being intentionally vague here =P), and I understand your feelings. I also felt that I had reached a high level of maturity at the age of 16, and that I was ready to take on the world, so to speak. I was also ready to meet my soulmate and settle down and have kids by... well, by now. As a 16-year-old I had experienced more than a lot of people do in a lifetime, and I won't go into any personal details, but it really shaped me into who I was at 16. And I was always a precocious child, which, coupled with an innate need to "live in other peoples' shoes" gave me the maturity of a 30-year-old by the time I was 16.

For the most part, I still feel the same way today. However, I have also learned a few things I did not know when I was 16, and one of them is that most other people do not reach the same maturity level until much later in life, and love is a two-way street. I dated many guys who seemed mature in the beginning, but when I got to know them better, their underlying immaturity would surface, manifesting itself in things like materialism, arrogance, and commitment-phobia. From this, I learned to be resilient, a skill I did not have as a teen. My first breakup was devastating - he was an overachiever with high dreams and a weak grasp on reality, and he had proposed to me. Even though I knew he was not right for me and I would have been miserable in the long run, I was not emotionally prepared for failure. It took about twenty tries before I was finally able to break away from the relationship. Like Aaliyah said, "if at first you don't succeed..." ~l~

But seriously, that is one critical difference between the 16-year-old me and the me now: experience. My ideals are still the same, but I am able to accept the fact that they may not always manifest themselves the way I want them to and when I want them to. And if they don't, I can move on and try again elsewhere.

Oh, and another thing I've learned is that it is human nature to become jaded and untrusting after negative experiences. While this may protect you from getting hurt in the future, it also blocks you from really living life and giving people a chance. You can probably tell this from some of the responses that you've gotten.

To wind up this peroration, I just wanted to say good luck. I honestly hope that you and your boyfriend work out in the long run, and if you are right for each other, then nothing anyone else says will matter. ~s~


Post #678298 Back to top ▲
5/6/2004
  
krissy
Member

I really shouldn't be replying to this, as my international economics paper is rotting in my bag, but... *g*

alio, I was 15 less than a decade ago (yes, I'm being intentionally vague here =P), and I understand your feelings. I also felt that I had reached a high level of maturity at the age of 16, and that I was ready to take on the world, so to speak. I was also ready to meet my soulmate and settle down and have kids by... well, by now. As a 16-year-old I had experienced more than a lot of people do in a lifetime, and I won't go into any personal details, but it really shaped me into who I was at 16. And I was always a precocious child, which, coupled with an innate need to "live in other peoples' shoes" gave me the maturity of a 30-year-old by the time I was 16.

For the most part, I still feel the same way today. However, I have also learned a few things I did not know when I was 16, and one of them is that most other people do not reach the same maturity level until much later in life, and love is a two-way street. I dated many guys who seemed mature in the beginning, but when I got to know them better, their underlying immaturity would surface, manifesting itself in things like materialism, arrogance, and commitment-phobia. From this, I learned to be resilient, a skill I did not have as a teen. My first breakup was devastating - he was an overachiever with high dreams and a weak grasp on reality, and he had proposed to me. Even though I knew he was not right for me and I would have been miserable in the long run, I was not emotionally prepared for failure. It took about twenty tries before I was finally able to break away from the relationship. Like Aaliyah said, "if at first you don't succeed..." ~l~

But seriously, that is one critical difference between the 16-year-old me and the me now: experience. My ideals are still the same, but I am able to accept the fact that they may not always manifest themselves the way I want them to and when I want them to. And if they don't, I can move on and try again elsewhere.

Oh, and another thing I've learned is that it is human nature to become jaded and untrusting after negative experiences. While this may protect you from getting hurt in the future, it also blocks you from really living life and giving people a chance. You can probably tell this from some of the responses that you've gotten.

To wind up this peroration, I just wanted to say good luck. I honestly hope that you and your boyfriend work out in the long run, and if you are right for each other, then nothing anyone else says will matter. ~s~


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